Beyond Me

The last few weeks have been crazy for everyone here in Birmingham.  It seems like everyone I speak to has a story about how they, or someone they know, have been affected by the storms of last week. 

I'm torn by my feelings about the affects of the storm on me.  On one hand, my family's lake house is fine, and just barely missed being obliterated by a tornado that destroyed the opposite side of the slough, and much more around the area, thus I feel grateful.  On the other hand, a friend of mine lost her life in the storms while protecting her young nephew from falling debris in the basement they occupied, thus I feel incredibly sad. 

The lake house is part of my family and plays lead in countless fond memories for four generations of Harts and numerous others.  When I turn onto the dirt road leading to the house, I can feel the stress and pressure of life melt away.  Usually at that point on the journey my dog starts making an outrageous noise that is a mixture of a howl, a bark and a whine, and I can't contain my laughter for long.  One mile later we arrive at our little slice of heaven on Maury Ferrell Road...if we're lucky we arrive in time to see the sunset.  I have a little bit of survivor's guilt about our place on Lake Martin being okay, and others being completely destroyed.  When I stand on the dock now and look across the slough in the area just above the horizon where the sun sets, instead of seeing a mature tree line I see what looks like a field that's been cleared.  Every time I think about our sweet little place on Lake Martin I feel a great sense of sadness, but also huge relief.

Sunset at Lake Martin, Thanksgiving 2010

As I mentioned earlier in the post, I lost a friend in the storms as well.  Carrie was a student at Minor graduating from high school the same year as I was graduating from Pinson.  She and my mom became instantly close, and as Carrie and I explored high school and college life together we became close as well.  Carrie was a selfless, beautiful human being, with a soul that shined through her beautiful smile.  She and her husband welcomed their son, Tucker, two months ago.  I am heartbroken to think that we won't see her smile again.  And just today as I was poking around on Twitter I found her page for the first time.  What a punch in the gut.  What happens to our digital lives once we're gone?  It's out there forever, and I can't help but think that I should be more intentional about what I put out there from now on.  Carrie did a wonderful job of portraying her kind, wonderful self at all times.  From her Twitter feed, you'd never know she had a thought that wasn't loving.

All of this is beyond me.  It absolutely blows my mind.  And to you, dear reader, I hope you are still awake after all of my rambling.